Rachel is up over at Faith and Family Live laughing about all the lines parents use -- Because I Said So, Because I'm the Mom, and, one of my favorites, Asked and Answered! A commenter added a link to the post This Hurts Me More Than It Hurts You. That's one hokey line that I've never tried on my kids, but I agree with every word she says.
Oh, the things we say!
As we get the little people ready for bed I find myself saying Jammies, Potty, Teeth just like my older sister, and when I'm dressing Ainsley, I'll say One foot, Two foot, yet another Auntie Kateism. I remember a student who would try to sneak out the door in a skimpy outfit only to hear her father say Where's the other half of that? or, his other favorite, You can wear that on your honeymoon!
Maybe I'm getting old and forgetful or maybe having four kids just like my parents has given me a much more sympathetic view of their parenting eccentricities, but I can't recall any particularly memorable lines they routinely sent our way. When Dad was irate, Do I make myself clear? was thrown out there. I'm pretty sure the correct response was Why, yes, Dad. Perfectly clear! Thanks for clarifying!
Mostly I remember the nicknames my Dad had for all of us. To this day, Kate is Mouse and I'm Bell Tell or simply Bell.
If I was distraught over this or that, Dad had a standard pep talk that began, "You get up in the morning, look in the mirror, and say my name is Kelly Dolin, and I can do this." I think he still delivers a version of this to my nieces and nephews. He's sweet and consistent like that, my Dad.
Though I can't conjure up tried and true lines my parents used, gosh, I'm just sure my kids could write a memorable Saturday Night Live skit with some of mine. I'm fairly sure I wouldn't want to view it. Oh, I have some funny lines, but I also have a few I'd rather forget.
When Kolbe was about two, I opened the freezer door and sent a dozen items flying to the floor.
"Don't be sad, Mama," Kolbe told me. "I'll get your damn it for you."
Sometimes it all comes right back at ya.
John's teacher pulled me aside recently to speak with me about potty talk. Some words come as no surprise to me living, as John does, with two much older brothers. Some words come as no surprise to me living, as John does, with an Irish mother. Then there's the lingering influence of Shreck II, a movie I would condemn in the strongest possible language, but then John just might repeat every word the following day at school.
Kids, here's a simple adage to follow: Do as I say not as I do!